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A short story (Thread)

(This story is shorter than it looks; please bear with it.)



Once upon a time in this village by the dammed river.

There was once a witch who ran away from this village. She was a fair and young lass, outcast for a reason she cannot even understand. But stay away she did, for she did cherish her life. But she couldn't avoid visiting the beautiful field of flowers nearby the village, but above the dam. It was dangerous, but she willed to ignore that danger for the flowers there that she cared for.

Rumors of the witch in the flower field soon spread to the village, but they were more rumors than truth. Still, the villagers avoided it in fear of the witch and a curse. Indeed, the witch was feared, but she knew better than to test that fear.

But not all of the villagers feared the flower field, it seems.

The sight that met the witch from beneath her favorite tree was a beautiful young girl, smiling, dancing. She danced as though she was with the wind, and the flowers danced with her very happily.

The witch was mesmerized by her beauty and grace. She watched her intently, staring, even. She was so charmed that she uttered a gasp, which seemed to startle the girl and caused her to stop her dancing. The girl turned to the direction of the gasp, a bewildered expression on her face.

The witch just blushed fiercely.

Of course, as adorable that might have been, the girl had heard the stories about the witch, and she was frightened. She was starting to tear up, and the witch panicked. The girl hic'd, and the witch panicked more. She's about to start crying, the witch thought.

Panickingly calming down her panic, the witch did an odd flourish with her hands, and voila, a gentle-looking pretty blue flower was held in her hand. This got rid of the crying, but the witch wanted the beautiful smile she had while dancing. Thinking quickly, the witch did that old finger trick. It was successful, and the girl was smiling in curiosity. If she knew about it, she probably would've laughed at how stupid it was, but that would have been fine for the witch, too.

The witch, too, was smiling. It was an awkward smile, but it was a happy smile. The witch was feeling joy leaping forth from inside her, a feeling she hardly remembered anymore. She made someone smile, and the witch was very happy about it.

The girl stood up, curtsied, and took the witch's hand, who just blushed. She felt very awkward, but despite that, the girl and the witch were soon dancing together on the flower field. Both were happy and wish it would last forever, but time was a cruel mistress, and the dusk beckoned the girl back to her village.

Since that day, the witch had always waited eagerly in the flower field for the girl. Some days she came, some days she didn't, but the witch was happy whenever the girl did come. Best of friends, the witch swore to not let any harm come to the girl. Which was why she was so stricken when the girl came one day and had a band-aged right eye. The girl still smiled like usual, but the witch was bothered.

Despite the girl's insisting that the witch not worry about it, the witch decided to follow her home that rainy night.


She was crying. The girl was crying. It was a silent cry, unheard over the grunts of men and slapping flesh.

There may have been other sounds, but the witch only saw the girl's tears. The witch only heard the girl's silent cries. The witch didn't feel her own tears rolling down, she didn't know that her face showed horror. But at the back of her head, she heard a woman's laugh.

It was an old pale-skinned woman with red lips, smoke spewing from them as she spoke to someone who looked like a monk. She was smiling as she brought the cigarette to her mouth again. The witch glared at that face.

Sadness. The witch had never felt so sad. Fear. Not for herself, but for her new and only friend. Regret. Idiocy. How did she have no idea of this?

But the witch was also feeling something she had never felt before: Rage. Pure, unbridled, rage. It boiled her blood, threatened to make her heart explode. It was all so confusing, she let out a scream. The windows of the small cottage shattered violently.

Amidst all the new screams, the raining scarlet, the violent darkness, the girl saw that the witch's crying visage was very visible.

When it all died down, the crying witch was hugging her knees in the center of it all. The girl hugged the witch, also tearing up.


It was still raining when dawn came. The girl and the witch were sitting beneath the witch's favorite tree, where they first met.

The witch had only now started fearing for herself when she realized what she had done, and was looking down, silent. The girl was looking at her, worried. Surely she, too, can cheer her up? With that thought, she stood up and started looking around. Then she found it. That gentle-looking blue flower. She knelt to pick it up, but froze when she heard noises.

The villagers must have organized a witch hunt after discovering what happened. She panicked, but her train of thought was halted when a boot stepped on the blue flower.

The girl looked up, frozen with fear. It was the monk from last night, his head all wrapped up with material quickly staining scarlet, and one of his eyes were gone. The monk grabbed at the girl's shoulder harshly, and she screamed, swinging her free arm at the man's face.

Accidentally pulling down the wraps of the monk's mummified face, the girl saw that the man's face was a skull-like mass of red, skin and some muscle ripped out. His lips were gone, and revealing crimson teeth. Half his nose was also gone, and the monk wheezed in pain with each breath.

They took the girl and the witch to the village's plaza, where they tied the witch to a thick and heavy wooden pole over piles of hay.

The monk furiously grabbed at the girl's hair as he made her watch as one of the villagers neared the witch, a knife in his hand. He jabbed the knife into the witch's stomach, and she cried in immense pain. The girl tried to free herself from the monk's grip from both her arm and her hair, but he was too strong. She instead screamed with the witch, her own tears gushing forth from her eyes.

The sickening noise of the next stab made her cry louder, and the girl's terrorized mind was quickly recalling all of their happy memories together as she also screamed.

That blue flower. Her curious finger trick.

Stab. The witch's blood was quickly pouring down from her stomach, running down her legs, and dripping down from her feet.

Her awkward smile. The witch was very bad at dancing and incredibly clumsy, but the girl had a lot of fun every time she was with the witch.

Stab. The hay beneath the witch's feet was turning crimson.

The witch's adorable blush. The girl had never been so happy with her life.

Her tears won't stop. The fire was starting spreading through the hay and crackling madly. It rose up high quickly and grew stronger. Her tears won't stop.

But the witch was trying to smile. The girl's tears still won't stop. The witch smiled. The witch grinned.

There was a blue flower hanging from her teeth.

Please smile. Smile, and keep smiling.
I don't like seeing you sad.
Smile, like you always do.

Please smile.

She's so stupid, the girl thought. So stupid. Behind those tears, grew a small smile that came unheeded.

You're so stupid.

The witch saw the smile, and the flower dropped and fell to the flames. She hung her head as the flames took her.

The villagers were cheering. The girl was staring at the flames. Her tears were still falling, but she was silent.

Then suddenly, a loud cracking noise stopped all of them. Everybody turned to that noise, just behind the burning witch, and everybody saw that the dam was giving away. The water exploded from it and gushed forth towards the village. Everybody was staring at it dumbfounded.

Another loud explosion of water from the dam snapped them all from their reverie, and suddenly the whole dam gave away, and the river they've held at bay for so long was rushing towards them, threatening to destroy everything they know.

Everybody but the girl ran away, their turns for screaming had come. None of them could outrun the furious torrent of water though, and soon the whole village was filled with high water.

The girl was being carried away by the violent water, and she held on to something to try and stay afloat. She burst out of the water, gasping for precious air. Then she saw the witch being carried away by the river, quite a distance away.

Although she knew nothing on how to do it, she swam with all her might towards the witch. She remembered how the witch would always try to cheer her up. Something hit her head, but she kept swimming. With the flames doused, maybe the witch was even still alive. Carrying her body to the shore was the least the girl could do for the witch.

Closer. Closer. Closer.

With the farthest reach she could've mustered, she grabbed the witch's hand and never let go. Even when that shadow of a huge wave of water loomed over her. she did not let go. The next thing she knew, she was underwater.

She was so tired.
So tired.
She closed her eyes.
She just realized that she had let go of the witch's hand. But she was so tired. The most her body could let her do was weakly open her eyes half the way.

There was a gentle light.

Vaguely, she felt herself being carried. The girl turned her head to look at her carrier. She was greeted a beautiful smiling face that looked back at her. That face ... was so familiar. The last thing she saw before she fell into the sea of unconsciousness were white wings glowing with the same gentle light.

Please smile.


When the girl came to, it was at the familiar flower field. Her head ached, like she woke up from a really deep sleep with a very bad dream. But she dismissed that. Instead, she looked and called for the witch in the flower field.

Upon nearing the witch's favorite tree, though, she realized that none of it was a dream.


She fell to her knees, crying.

Please smile.

The girl cried. She hung her head and cried.


Soon, she became part of the flower field. A black, poisonous flower. A deadly flower that tended to all other flowers nearby it. In Phriane, where this tale originates from, they call it the kraehe. Ironically considering the story, in Kanna it symbolizes joy.


Disclaimer: Everything about this story is fictional. that includes the kraehe, Phriane, and Kanna. Kraehe is a reference you'll get if you watch Princess Tutu (which you should).

Afterword: When suddenly, the creativity block on my head was lifted, I just had to write something. You know how it is. C&C pleeaasse. I have my own ideas on what's wrong with this story, but before I fix everything, I'd like everybody else's opiniooonns.

This story is set in a world I created on my own (and is still under construction). It's nerdy, yes. Haters gonnna hate.

Well I thought the story was very good. You should keep writing because I'd read them all.

you're welcome :3

btw that picture looks like the girl from princess tutu (which is an awesome anime)

and furthermore tl;dr

Like a fairy tale. A true fairy tale, because the real ones don't have perfectly happy endings.

I really enjoyed the lack of dialogue.

That was beautiful, heartbreaking and yet so sweet... I loved every single word. @Dante_Butler, you didn't read, then make comments like that picture looks like the girl from princess tutu... really now...

Anyways, This story was very well written, I would have had a smoother transition from the point of view of the witch to the girl, but all in all it is just strikingly beautiful. Now give me more dammit....

@Zangkin @Shirosuke
And away to write more stuff I go!

Yeah, but I wouldn't call this a happy ending either. D: Or are there more depressing fairy tales than I'm aware of

I wrote it with "legend" in mind. In a more classic sense (not because it's legendary), like the origin story of something material. Such as the story of how corn came to be. Or in this case, a fictional flower.

Dialogue is my weakness, bahahaha

i think its a cute story =w= work on it .

Thaaaanks. Or something.

Such a beautiful tale. ^.^ Short and sweet in every sense of the word. I'll remember this tale and tell it to my child when she becomes restless at bedtime - thanks.

@Yoshiya Are you planning to write some more? ^o^

Josh! I like it a lot!! Is it alright, if you want to and have bursts of inspiration, can you upload more? sits patiently

Joshuaaaa it's so beautifulllll. Did you draw the picture yourself? I feel like drawing an illustration for it too. Write more and put it up on this thread when you do!

You guys, I really don't see the happy or sweet parts here. ;__;

Don't tell it to your children, it's depressing!

I try to find inspiration. ;w;

Oh, no. Not mine. xD

Awhh, Yoshi! Good job! It was, as everyone said, a beautiful story. I loved it~ n__n

Thank yoou!

Very good, I really enjoyed it.
The best part is that you actually ended it which is something I rarely do when I start writing stuffz.
Well I hope to read more from you. Kinda makes me want to write again...

I really liked it! it was a beautiful fairytale, you should write your own book! I know I'd buy it :)

Ending a story... isn't that hard? xD

If only it were that easy to do satisfyingly. orz

This was enjoyable, I hope to see more if you ever feel like writing :) And... Why would anyone make comments about a story if they didn't even read it?... Good lord it's hard to believe people are that silly :/

@Yoshiya beautiful story it was so sad and yet perfect. i love your story it makes me wanna put up my story.

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